Putting My Oxygen Mask on First – “KonMari”ing my Life

This week I did an experiment applying the KonMari method to my life – not just possessions. Focusing on what food, activities, and people spark joy in my life. If you are living under a rock, and haven’t heard of the KonMari method, it is a tidying and organizing method developed by Marie Kondo, the author of “The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up”and star of the Netflix show “Tidying Up with Marie Kondo”. Her method helps you develop a sense for what items spark joy in your life.

I had two main insights from my week.

1. Choosing what sparks joy doesn’t lead to a hedonistic life. I can trust myself to want to do things that are in my best interest over the long term. I had this idea that I needed to “parent” myself…so that I’d eat healthy foods, keep things clean and organized, and spend time on work. I thought if I followed what “sparked joy”, I’d spend my days binging Netflix, buying new shoes or gorging myself with decadent food and margaritas. But the reality was that when I really tuned into my body what my body and spirit want…I found it’s lots of fresh fruits and veggies, cups of tea, walks in the woods, and meditation. They also like to clean my office and home because they are grateful to have such beautiful serene spaces, and enjoy taking action to maintain that. Will they want the occasional piece of cake made from scratch, glass of wine  or episode of The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel? Of course!! And I will enjoy those fully.
2. I spend a lot of time “numbing” myself doing activities that don’t spark joy for me (or don’t spark joy in that minute because this isn’t the activity I’m meant to do at that time)…and they’re not always “bad” habits. I will read a book, play Words with Friends, or catch up with someone I haven’t talked to in a long time to avoid sitting with my emotions. I wasn’t aware I had so many numbing mechanisms beyond having a glass of prosecco, eating sweets and scrolling through social media. This new awareness has allowed me to make different choices at times.

Overall, my experiment left me feeling JOY and lightness. There is a freedom in knowing that I can trust myself and my desires, and that I’m meant to fill my days with sparks of joy.  Now, excuse me as I head out for another adventure in the woods.